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Racing is FAKE ! 27/10/2007

Turf Deli can reveal that we have the inside scoop on the dramas that unfolded minutes before the Caulfield Cup last week.

Racing, like Wrestling, is of course, totally fake , and written to carefully stage managed scripts.

Last week’s dramas were part of a clever marketing ploy by Racing Victoria to move racing out of the much maligned “Sporting” tag and into the highly esteemed category of “Sports Entertainment”.

It was the evil Russian ANNENKOV, who with a concealed object under his saddle took a swipe at Golden Boy MALDIVIAN, whilst he was prancing and flexing his muscular physique in the starting gates, opening up a heavily bleeding wound. ANNENKOV’s tag team partner, the mad Arab TAWQEET picked up a steel chair (that just happened to be sitting behind the starting gates), whilst the starter was not watching, and much to the horror of the crowd, came from behind pin up girl ESKIMO QUEEN and swiped her, sending her to the ground and leaving her sprawling underneath the starter’s gates. As the crowd boo-ed and hissed the two favourites were lead away, whilst the evil henchmen proudly played up their exploits to the crowd.

However, this is where the script went a little astray – MALDIVIAN, was supposed to be carried off on a stretcher, heavily bleeding, writhing in agony, till he reached the mounting yard again, where in front of the capacity crowd, he was going to surge again and leap up from the canvas. With a fearsome look in his eye he would storm back to the starting gates, take his place in the field, jump away and seek out his two arch rivals, sending them up and over the running rail with his trade mark move – the double back kick , before storming to a historic victory, with ESKIMO QUEEN ready to leap into his victorious lap after the event. Racing, as a sports entertainment spectacle, would’ve never seen the likes of it before

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